Things I Don’t Know How to Handle
One of the things that puts me in a very awkward state of being is when large people make fun of themselves for being fat.
I have no idea how to react to that. For instance, the following conversation:
“Look at those adorable chubby feet (referring to Button’s very square feet). S would love her feet. She thinks chubby things are cute. That’s why she likes me!”
Suddenly the record in my brain squeals to a halt and I have no idea what to say. Basically, it seems to boil down to two alternatives, equally displeasing.
Laughing with the joke feels like the equivalent of “Yeah, you are pretty fat, aren’t you?”
On the other hand, I could totally lie and say something absurd like “Oh don’t be silly, you’re not overweight at all!” But that would be really obvious, and in addition to feeling dishonest, that kind of insincerety is rarely appreciated anyway.
Look, I’m glad that some people are comfortable enough with their weight to take it lightly. I just don’t know what to do with that. And you never quite know if they’re REALLY joking, or just testing the water.
So what usually ends up happening is a short, awkward pause in the conversation, until I abruptly change the subject. Which, I fear, is equally as obvious and comes accross more as “Well, yeah, you’re fat but I wasn’t going to say anything…anyway…” which is not what I intend.
I don’t really notice when other people are overweight. It doesn’t make a difference in whether I see them in positive or negative light.
I can understand that there are a lot of them who are very sensitive about it, and that’s pretty easy to deal with by avoiding the subject.
But the other 10% who deal with it by joking…THAT I have yet to learn how to handle gracefully. Especially since the whole topic is so “taboo.” I’ll probably get hate mail for mentioning the word “fat” in this post.
August 14th, 2006 at 10:54 pm
I LOVE your Blog!!! Where can i get one like this?? LOL. I also read your About Page and some of the things remind me of myself. Starting projects I never finish, being impatient, and changing my mind are just a few. As far as people joking about being “heavy”, “chubby”, or “fat,” it’s hard for me to say anything. My husband is a little chubby and jokes about it alot because he is just very secure and and was raised to love himself. I on the other hand am VERY insecure- Read my blog for yesterday LOL. So anyway I actually live with someone like that.
August 15th, 2006 at 12:43 am
Hmmm. That’s a sticky one. I kinda hate that too. What I really hate (and get all the time around my neck of the woods?) are the obviously lithe, lean chicks sporting their tracksuits making comments like, “God, I look like such a cow! I REALLY need to get back in shape.” I mean, of course I end up looking at them cross-eyed and all. But, for God’s sake, if you’re fishing for a compliment just come out and say, “I’m feeling a little unpretty today. Could you just tell me how good I look?”
(sheesh!)
August 15th, 2006 at 9:33 am
You are SO right!! I know that feeling and never know what to do myself. You are glad they are lighthearted about it but what are YOU supposed to say back!
BTW, I LOVE LOVE LOVE the new template! WOW! The colors are fabulous and I just adore it!