Well, I did it. I indulged in the purest form of female masochism: swim-suit shopping.

I do believe that this activity can make me feel more ancient at 26 years old than any other practice known to man.

Of course, there’s the post-baby body problem and the fact that there just isn’t anything in the form of a swimsuit that can overcome those areas. Enough said.

In addition, are you aware that there is no longer any such thing as a 1-piece swimsuit? Nada, zip, zero, zilch.

And when did the going rate for a piece of nylon spandex become $100??? I very distinctly remember thinking that $50 was overpriced just a few years ago. Now you’re lucky to get half the suit for that.

Speaking of which, what is the deal with selling the two pieces separately now, as though you have the option to buy just HALF a swim suit? And why is it absolutely IMPOSSIBLE to find a top and a bottom to the same suit in the SAME SIZE? Don’t they order them together? If there are 5 size 6’s in the top, doesn’t it stand to reason that there should be at least ONE size 6 in the bottom part?

One other thing that surprised me is that swim suits are getting less revealing. Apparently the designers have caught on that normal women don’t look like Claudia Shiffer and therefore don’t feel comfortable exposing every inch of their flesh. Where you used to see only bikinis and strings, now there are tummy-covering tankinis and little skirts for those who are sensitive about their hips. Of course, they’re both hideous once you try them on, but I appreciate the designing world’s efforts to accommodate the less expositionary among us.

Long story short, I did find a suit. Not something I’d be strutting about for the fun of it, but something that I’m at least somewhat comfortable in amongst my family.

Shopping for Button is SO much more fun. Everything looks good on her.

This entry was posted on Monday, May 29th, 2006 at 2:03 pm and is filed under Body Issues, Daily, Parenting. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.