So today is our weekly “Cleanse” day. It’s basically a liquid fast. No food, but you drink this fortified juice stuff 4 times during the day and eat “snack” tablets.

The tablets are ok (if you like chocolate Tums), but the juice tastes like a berry-flavored foot. With a touch of gangrene.

I think you’re supposed to mix it with water but it’s so bad we’ve taken to just chugging it straight, before our mouths register the taste - then follow quickly with gulps of vodka some other energy juice we’re allowed to drink.

The hardest part is that Little Button hasn’t been eating too well recently so I spend all day offering her whole milk and yogurt and turkey and cheese and bread with honey and ground beef and pasta, only to have her turn her nose up at it, and I’m like CHILD, WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU, CAN YOU NOT SEE THE HEAVENLY DELICACIES POURED OUT BEFORE YOU???

Because seriously, the dog is eating better than me today.

This entry was posted on Wednesday, March 21st, 2007 at 1:36 pm and is filed under Daily, Healthy Crap. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.