I received this email today from a dear, yet gullible, family member:

To all of my friends, I do not usually forward messages,But this is from my friend Pearlas Sandborn and she really is an attorney. If she says that this will work - It will work. After all,What have you got to lose?

SORRY EVERYBODY.. JUST HAD TO TAKE THE CHANCE!!! I’m an attorney, And I know the law. This thing is for real. Rest assured AOL and Intel will follow through with their promises for fear of facing a multimillion-dollar class action suit similar to the one filed by PepsiCo against General Electric not too long ago.

Dear Friends; Please do not take this for a junk letter. Bill Gates sharing his fortune. If you ignore this, You will repent later. Microsoft and AOL are now the largest Internet companies and in an effort to make sure that Internet Explorer remains the most widely used program, Microsoft and AOL are running an e-mail beta test.

When you forward this e-mail to friends, Microsoft can and will track it (If you are a Microsoft Windows user) For a two weeks time period.

For every person that you forward this e-mail to, Microsoft will pay you $245.00 For every person that you sent it to that forwards it on, Microsoft will pay you $243.00 and for every third person that receives it, You will be paid $241.00. Within two weeks, Microsoft will contact you for your address and then send you a check.

Regards. Charles S Bailey General Manager Field Operations
1-800-842-2332 Ext. 1085 or 904-1085 or RNX 292-1085
[mailto:Charles_Bailey@csx.com]Charles_Bailey@csx.com
[mailto:Charles_bailey@csx.com]Charles_bailey@csx.com

I thought this was a scam myself, But two weeks after receiving this e-mail and forwarding it on, Microsoft contacted me for my address and within days, I received a check for $24,800.00. You need to respond before the beta testing is over. If anyone can afford this, Bill gates is the man.

It’s all marketing expense to him. Please forward this to as many people as possible. You are bound to get at least $10,000.00. We’re not going to help them out with their e-mail beta test without getting a little something for our time. My brother’s girlfriend got in on this a few months ago. When i went to visit him for the Baylor/UT game. She showed me her check. It was for the sum of $4,324.44 and was stamped “Paid in full”

I didn’t even look this one up on Google because it was simply too ridiculous.

First of all, if Pearlas Sandborn really is an attorney, she is a very stupid one and we should all take a moment to pity anyone hapless enough to be her client.

Second, I work in network marketing. People, NOT EVEN BILL GATES has enough money to distribute in the way this email suggests. Every government economy in the world would have to pitch in to foot that bill.

And further, if Bill Gates did have that impossible amount of money - it’s pretty asinine to think that he would give it to YOU. Nobody is going to pay you to send emails unless you are a spammer and then you deserve to DIE. But you still won’t make that kind of money, even after the devil shows up to claim your soul.

Sheesh.

I learned something about my attention span tonight.

My husband and brother are in the living room watching Weatherman. I made it through the first 15 minutes of the movie and had to leave because sitting through it was just. too. painful.

I learned that a movie really has to have some semblance of a PLOT if I’m going to devote my time to it.

On the bright side, the memory upgrade for my laptop showed up today, so it no longer takes 15 minutes to start up my computer. Yay!

Not much of an update, just a lame teaser.

I didn’t post yesterday because it was a rather stressful day.  I’m not a Type A personality, so I generally don’t get stressed out about things too much…unless they concern my daughter.

Yesterday we got some … disturbing … news which could force us to make some difficult decisions in the very near future.  At the very least, it puts us in an uncomfortable limbo right now. 

Unfortunately, I don’t think it would be prudent for me to say much more than that at this time.

PS:  No, the “news” didn’t come from a doctor.

I think my cat is in heat. Lately there has been a male cat stalker outside our front door, howling his amorous advances into the wee hours of the morning until we chase him off with a squirt bottle.

And for the last two days J and I have looked over to see the dog attempting to…well, you know. To the cat.

The biggest problem with this scenario is that our cat has been neutered. And yes, I did mean to say “NEUTERED.”

We have a male cat. Who is apparently emitting some sort of female pheromones that every other male animal in the vicinity is picking up on.

“Maybe he’s gay.”
“A gay cat?”
“Sure. It would explain so many things about him. It happens in the animal kingdom sometimes.”
“Only with monkeys.”
“Well apparently he’s not the only one. That other cat comes by every night.”
“Great. We have an abundance of gay pu$sy in the neighborhood.”

(blink, blink) “…That is so going to be the title of my next blog entry.”

“I don’t even want to know about the pervert hits you’re going to get from Google with that.”

“I am ready to kill myself and eat my dog, if medicine prices here [insert website] are bad.”

Ok, show of hands from everyone who would ever consider buying medicine from a guy who threatens to eat his dog.

Yeah, that’s what I thought.